How to Choose Your Bridal Party: Real Bride Shenali on Bridesmaids, Bridesmen & Big Bridal Parties

How to Choose Your Bridal Party: Real Bride Shenali on Bridesmaids, Bridesmen & Big Bridal Parties

 

Choosing your bridal party sounds fun… until you sit down with the list and realise this is where emotions get real.
Who do you include?
How many is “too many”?
Will someone feel left out?
Do the numbers have to match?

Every bride hits this crossroads, and Melbourne bride Shenali, who’s getting married in 2025, was no different. What started as a simple “maybe just one each” quickly escalated into a heartfelt, meaningful—and yes, big—seven-person bridal party on each side.

Her story is a beautifully honest look at modern weddings: less about rules, more about relationships.

At Bluebell Bridal, we hear these dilemmas every day in our fitting rooms. What brides really want is permission to choose what feels right for them. Shenali’s story gives exactly that.

How Seven Became the Magic Number

When Shenali and her fiancé Andrew first talked about their wedding party, she imagined something small and simple—just her twin brother and his sister.

But then reality set in.

Andrew, who has lived in Scotland, the UK and Australia, has collected deep friendships across every chapter of his life. He’s also the last in his friendship group to get married—and has stood beside almost all of them as either a groomsman or best man.

“If I’m finally doing this, I want them all. I can’t cut anyone—they’re my people.” — Andrew

This is where most brides panic. Shenali did too:

“Seven? Is that outrageous? Can we cut? Surely that’s too many?”

But the more they talked, the clearer it became:
These weren’t acquaintances. These were people flying from Scotland, England, Brisbane, Melbourne and beyond to celebrate their wedding in Sri Lanka.
This wasn’t excess—it was honouring their story.

So they said yes.
Yes to seven groomsmen.
Yes to seven on her side.
Yes to a wedding party that felt full, joyful and intentional.

A Modern Bridal Party: Bridesmaids + Bridesmen

Here’s where Shenali’s bridal party gets beautifully modern.

Her seven are a mix of:

• Man of Honour — her twin brother

• Maid of Honour — her cousin, who’s like an older sister

• Bridesman — her oldest friend from high school

• Two long-time high school girlfriends

• One university friend she travelled the world with

• Emily (Bluebell Bridal’s Alterations Manager) representing her work family

Every person represents a different chapter of her life.
That’s the magic of a thoughtful bridal party—not symmetry, not tradition, but storytelling through people.

“They all feel like home. That’s how I knew.”

Did They Consider Uneven Numbers? Yes — And It Nearly Happened

This is important because many brides feel guilty about uneven sides.

At one point, Andrew’s list hit eight, while Shenali considered five or six.

And guess what?

It was completely fine.

Because today’s weddings don’t require walking in pairs, matching numbers or perfect symmetry. The old rules simply don’t apply anymore.

• No one remembers who was “partnered” with whom.

• Photos look beautiful with natural groupings.

• Guests care about energy, not mathematics.

They could have kept it uneven.
They chose to match it.
Both options were valid.

And that’s exactly the point.

Choosing Colours & Styles: Where the Real Cohesion Happened

Here’s where things tie beautifully into Bluebell Bridal.

Because Andrew is wearing a traditional Scottish kilt, the entire bridal party colour palette flowed from his look.

They chose a sage green palette—soft, elevated, elegant, and perfectly suited to Sri Lanka’s lush surroundings. Conveniently, green is also Shenali’s favourite colour.

To keep things unified but not rigid:

Women in the bridal party:

• Same overall silhouette

• Different necklines chosen for comfort

• Shades of sage that complement each skin tone

Men in the bridal party:

• Wearing kilts to match Andrew’s traditional look

Shoes:

• Nude or neutral tones, but completely flexible

This is exactly the kind of styling strategy we help brides with at Bluebell Bridal: cohesion without uniformity, beauty without discomfort.

“If they’re uncomfortable, it shows on their face. I want my bridal party to enjoy the day, not feel restricted.”

Assigning Roles: Keep It Light & Human

Old-school weddings treated bridesmaids like attendants or staff.

That era is gone.

Shenali is intentionally keeping roles minimal and joyful:

• Her brother will give a speech.

• Her cousin and brother help plan.

• Everyone else?
  They get to enjoy the day.“I don’t want them running around doing errands. They’re there to celebrate, not serve.”

Modern. Balanced. Humane.

This mindset is exactly what we see with thoughtful, emotionally intelligent brides.

What Brides Can Learn: Shenali’s Real Advice

These aren’t generic tips—they’re rooted in her lived experience.

1. Choose people who feel like “home.”

Not the loudest.
Not the most convenient.
Not the ones someone told you to pick.
Choose the ones who make you feel grounded.

2. Forget the pressure of even numbers.

5, 6, 7, 10—there is no “ideal”.
Modern weddings aren’t maths equations.

3. Comfort comes first.

For your party and yourself.
If you want mixed-gender attendants, do it.
If someone wants a different neckline, let them.
Aligned energy matters more than aligned hemlines.

4. Honour your story.

Your bridal party is a living, breathing memory map of your life.
That’s the beauty of it.

5. Tradition is optional.

Take the parts you love.
Leave the parts that feel outdated.

Final Word: There Are No Rules Except This One

Your bridal party should reflect your heart, your life, your journey—and no one else’s expectations.

If you’re unsure how to bring your bridal party vision to life—styles, colours, cohesion, comfort—our stylists at Bluebell Bridal work through this with brides every single day.

👉 Watch the entire Episode on YouTube Now

Let us help you create a bridal party look that feels intentional, timeless and completely yours.